The Breaking Of Bread

Cora silently watched Auth leave. She was really disappointed in him not finding the time for such a small little event. It was not long! She took a mental note about being grumpy about that the next time she would meet him. If she would meet him, given he never really had time for anyone.

These people sitting here were after all his only friends. Atleast that's what she believed. Someone like him could not possible have other friends given how much of a weirdo he was...

Neither Mitsuo or Alan were exeptionally normal either though. Mitsuo was a mechanic, technically in the military, practically....not as much. Alan was a thinker, he was in the right position with the unicorns, just...she wondered how he got there. She could not possible imagine him being in the top 10 of his class. He just seemed to frail!

She was quite tempted ot ask him about it, but refrained from doing so, their discussion was in no way related and it might seem agressive.

"Steak for me, please, medium. Uhm...yeah that's it.", she said to the waitress. As that was out of the way now she could talk to Alan about Mitsuo's little defense program.

"Yeap, currently have my best guards there. Or some of the best to put it like that. Very good people. They watch out, they get paid well and they are all encouraged to tell on each other if one does anything bad, given what a reward they do get if they find something out. Bribing them is not too easy. And...to be fully honest with you, they are really not the smartest, they have no idea what Mitsuo is working on. Heck...even I don't."

She probably made herself seem quite dumb right now...dammit.

"Well...I was not there much either. I surely can figure it out, but I am not interested, it's not my job."

Mitsuo skimmed over the menu multiple times, frustration expressed on his face. After a short moment, he gave up on trying to decide what to have with a sigh.
"I'll have the roasted chicken too please," the mechanic smiled at the waiter as he spoke.

Mitsuo waited for the waiter to leave before talking to his friends again.
"Well... all I'm going to tell you now is that if these projects work then the whole world may change for us."
Mitsuo took a hesitant pause.
"I would tell you more about the project Auth and I have going but I would need to check with him if it's ok to tell you guys."

Mitsuo held his chin thinking, "I'm not sure if I should tell about my other project though, especially in public like this."

Alan sat and listened as his companions talked. Listening was the best part, after all - not only did you learn the things that you were told, but it also allowed you to learn more about the speaker non-directly.
After all was said and done, the waiter left, carrying the menus with him. Alan took another swig of the chilly water, looking lost in thought.
Cora's boasts about her men were... Surprisingly good. Discipline, loyalty... It definitely sounded like Cora incorporated military functions into her people. Not that it was surprising. Cora had been a stellar soldier before... she left.
Alan looked up at her, gears turning. Somewhere in there, surely the voices were there. Cora may see these voices as her friends, but they're undoubtedly her enemy. As competent a person and a leader as she was, Alan knew all it would take was a nudge in the wrong direction and the Leader of the Pack would spiral out of control. Cora may be one of the most capable people Alan knew... But she was a loose cannon. Anything goes.

Alan shook his head, as if jolting himself awake. What was he THINKING? It was Cora! His friend! The smiley, tall, energetic lass! Why would he think about her like that!?
Alan turned his attention back to the conversation. "Your projects may change all of our lives? I do greatly admire your work, Mitsuo, but you mustn't blame me for my reluctance to believe such boasts. I am sure your work is of great importance, esspecially if it's something you need so many people for, but is it THAT big?"

Alan dismissed the topic of conversation. He found himself slowly growing envious of the young mechanic and his ability to work on his aspirations in such straightforward ways.
"I had a chance to visit the outer districts recently. Things are looking bad. Like, worse than they have been when I lived there. Life is the same in the Inner Districts - you can't even tell anything is wrong beyond the walls."
Alan paused for a bit, then turned to Mitsuo.
"You're a scout." he said, face stern behind his small glasses "Your mission is to advance humanity, to create hope. Do you really believe there's hope for us? For humanity? Look at how we devour ourselves in our stone cage. What will we achieve by expanding it?"

Alan stared sullenly at the table. For a moment, the restaurant didn't seem as cheery or warm. He spent his whole life dedicated to helping others, but Alan had only been disappointed in return. Sometimes he found it hard to believe in his cause.

Cora was wondering why Mitsuo did not choose something more delicious. Roasted chicken. Come on! Roasted CHICKEN! And why did Alan choose that as well? It made no sense to her, there were many more interesting items on the menu. Chicken was certainly not one of them. It was probably the type that was way too crunchy. Not tender at all.

Cora's mind spiraled further and further into the chicken thoughts.

Alan suddenly started talking alot, so she kind of got kicked out of her thoughts. he seemed...desperate, hopeless, lost...she felt sorry for him. He kind of seemed like he needed a warm hug. A shoulder to cry on.

...

So why did noone hug him? Someone should! And soon as well! A small thought crossed her mind...what if...she? No. She was too tough for that. Too weird. She was not the right person. He would probably think she was about to stab him! Even though that would definitly put him out of his missery. She did not really know what to do and just put a hand on his shoulder awkwardly. Maybe that helped.

She stayed silent out of fear she might ruin everything.

Mitsuo chuckled to Alan's remark.
"Okay, maybe I did exaggerate. However, optimism is not a bad trait to have. I'd like to think I can change the word for the better, at least."

Mitsuo's cheerfulness soon dwindled however at Alan's directed questions.
He noticed Cora's action of support and also felt pity for the MP Captain.
The young Shimura's pity was overpowered by his self-doubt and sudden feeling of emptiness.

"I try my best to not think about it but I guess there's no avoiding it now."
The mechanic sighed and rubbed his forehead, "if I'm honest... no. I don't believe there's hope. Not for us or any survivors outside the walls. We cannot ignore that the Titans are an overpowering force, especially considering we don't know how many there are. The threat's also increased as people can shift into Titans..."
Mitsuo slammed his fist down onto the table, "but I'll be damn if I have to give up. If there's no hope then I'll make it. Even if there's no chance, I'll take one. Something needs to be done and wallowing in our tears does not count! I'll fight until I can't breathe, I'll craft until my fingers break... I'll dream until I die! I suggest, Alan, you do the same. You'll get more out of life that way."

A small, tense silence took over the table after Alan spoke. Looks were exchanged, and no words were spoken.
Alan suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder. Alan jolted up, making eye contact with Cora. The usually jovial and talkative mercenary seemed to be at a loss for words, for once. Her face spoke of uncertainty. She probably wasn't used to consoling her own pack members.
Her palm felt hot on Alan's skin, but upon consideration it became apparent that Alan's skin was simply cold, and the ex-soldier's hand was no different than any other hand.
The young captain appreciated the gesture, but it somehow felt alien, somehow felt wrong. Something about the chemistry between Cora and Alan seemed to forbid such actions. Alan was unsure why he felt that way, but then his attention was drawn to Mitsuo, who began answering his question.

Alan stared at Mitsuo as he spoke, his face a stoic mask, revealing no agreement nor disregard. It was disheartening to Alan to hear that even the scouts did not believe there was any hope to humanity. And they were the torchbearers! Those who light the fires of hope! If they couldn't hope, who could?
However, Mitsuo seemed reluctant to let it get to him. His contradictory belief, that despite having no chance of success, the act of trying would give him purpose, Alan understood all too well. His entire life, even before joining the Military, has been centered on doing his best to change things that were seemingly unchangeable. Helping all those people around him, trying to make a difference in a world where he was nothing but a tiny, insignificant, poor speck.
Mitsuo hadn't told anything new to Alan. If anything, it was as if he held up a mirror, reflecting a truth he knew all along back at him. Still, the young Military Policeman decided it would be disrespectful to say something like that. For now, he would act brave and smile as if all was okay.
"Thanks, guys." Alan said, smiling shyly, his despair hidden under a veil of friendly and courtesy.
Alan paused for a moment, before turning to Cora.
"Uh, Cora." he said, looking down at the table, slightly embarrassed "You can take your hand off now."

"Ahhaaha...", said Cora surprised, she was not sure what she wanted to say but hey...atleast she 'said' something, right? And a first louder then more quitely going 'ahhaaha' was certainly something! Totally not embarassing!

It was times like these Cora dammned her pale skin. She turned red immediatly, and not just the cute blush red. Nooooooo. It had to be the full 'tomato' red. She quickly took her hand off and stared on the table for a second, giving everyone time to recover from this marvelous experience.

Her plan to make everything better, which would have probably backfired got interupted by the waitress serving the food.

Those people with their chicken though...
Cora grabbed a knife and a fork and wished everyone a good apetite.
"Let's eat before I cause even more trouble", she said and grinned at the two before starting to eat her steak.
It was great, bloody on the inside...just...perfect....and those potatoes! AWESOME!
Cora happily started munching.

Mitsuo couldn't help but chuckle at the interaction between his two friends. Never has he recalled two people being so startled by a simple gesture of reassuring.

"Yes... let's eat," Mitsuo agreed with Cora as he started dissecting his chicken to take small bites. The chicken was dry and bland, at least to Mitsuo's tastes, but he wouldn't complain, he ordered it after all.

The lack of taste wouldn't have bothered Mitsuo, anyway, as he had lost his appetite after Alan's question.
He couldn't help but let his mind dwell on his reply.
'Do I truly believe that?'
He mentally questioned.
'Can one create hope? Or is that just another fantasy of mine? I feel as if I have blinded myself from reality by striving for a dream...'
His thoughts escaped him as he whispered the trailing end of his internal monologue, "there really is no such thing as paradise."

Mitsuo took another bite before taking a sip of water.

René walked down the cobbles silently. It was mostly dark out already, and some of the houses were already showing little lights in which people were enjoying their ominous, but comforting flame.

He had gotten out of work early, but had changed to go and do some more work for a nearby farm. By now, he was ready to fall to his feet and his stomach was talking to him. He paused outside a fashionably lit restaurant. He couldn't make out it's name and didn't even bother with his glasses. Nearby the window he could make a jolly group, enjoying their time and food together. When the door opened as someone exited, the scent was unbearably delicious.

Checking his wallet and the quality of people inside, he decided to go in quickly for tea and a slice of something. they always had something. As he was seated closer to the storefront (all the fancy people were probably in the back) he noticed that same jolly group of people.

Interesting group that's for sure. One looked like a mechanic, the other had glasses and looked rather shy, and lastly there was a women with long blond hair. She seemed to be the life of the party, talking it up with her friends.

While waiting for a waiter, as it was very busy that night, he took out his sketch book and flipped to a blank page. Might as well practice something, right?
He tapped his pencil thoughtfully against his chin, looking around the room to figure out something to draw. Maybe he should just draw whatever comes. Yeah. Or that group... interesting people.

He glanced up at them, nobody was looking his way. He started with a very fast sketch, mapping where everyone would be and such, only pausing when the waiter came to take his order. "I'll take some tea and uh... you guys have bread here right?" The waiter nodded and scurried off to the kitchen to attend to the food.

Shifting his attention back to his sketch, he started with the mechanic looking person, who was sitting quite still. What a good person to draw... he has such interesting attire. For some reason he was quite worried about getting discovered. Could this be considered stalking or invasion of privacy? Oh well. He rolled his shoulder and continued with his sketch.

Alan would've laughed at Cora's sudden embarrassment, were he not just as embarrassed as her. While he certainly turned no shade of red, his cheeks certainly did grow a little hotter. He turned his head, pretending to survey the restaurant. It still seemed to be rather pleasant, with people dining and having a good time. Taking a break from the daily grind, from their jobs that yield no return, from the endless fight against the titans, from the inevitability of death.

There. That should be enough time for the blush to go away. He turned his head back towards his friends, trying to catch glances, to see if any of them noticed. Mitsuo certainly have, as he chuckled to himself in rueful delight. Cora was still busy struggling against her transformation into a tomato. Alan found it funny how a dark and mischievous mercenary could be thrown off so bad by social interactions.
An important tool in your arsenal, should things go wrong, a voice said in his head.
Alan was abashed at his own mind. Why would he possibly need to abuse this sort of weakness? What was it that kept him on edge around Cora? Why couldn't he treat her like he treated Mitsuo? What was going on?

Thankfully, his spiral toward self-loathing was ended by the waitress, bringing their meals. Cora was already chewing happily into her steak, munching with the satisfaction of a hungry wolf. Mitsuo seemed to be taking more cautious bites of his own meal, thinking hard. As for Alan, he just ate. Food was food to him. He didn't have the ability to tell if the chicken was better or worse than average, he was still not accustomed enough to it. He enjoyed it because it was warm and filled his stomach, and that's all that mattered.
He heard Mitsuo comment quietly about paradise while eating. Alan would've inquired, but he was far too busy with his own meal. It was important to eat before it got cold!
Alan smiled. Some ghosts never cease to haunt you. Even with his mother dead, her strict rules about how food should be eaten still applied to him every day. How intriguing.